I feel lost. I feel stupid. I feel like (hell, I know) I have no clue or idea on what will happen or take place or where I will go. I have no freakin’ clue as to what anything or anyone or anywhere is.
I guess I’m a fool.
In the world’s eyes that is…
“For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written: ‘I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.’ Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength. Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: ‘Let him who boasts boast in the Lord.’ When I came to you, brothers, I did not come with eloquence or superior wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God. For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified. I came to you in weakness and fear, and with much trembling. My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power, so that your faith might not rest on men’s wisdom, but on God’s power.” (I Corinthians 1:18-2:5, NIV)
Unfortunately, I’m a fool in my own eyes: “As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.” (Prov. 26:11, NIV) (See also Psalm 38)
Even worse, in God’s: “He who trusts in himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe.” (Prov. 28:26, NIV)
Too often lately I have returned to my vomit…trusted in myself, so that “My wounds fester and are loathsome because of my sinful folly.” (Psalm 38:6, NIV)
I need to realize that, to truly follow God, I need to change those things around: I need to be a fool in the world’s eyes, yes…but by embracing God’s wisdom. And in doing so, I’ll know that I am doing what is right, and in doing so, fix my wrong image of self.
(1) As a wise man of the world, I am a fool to God.
(2) To become a wise man of God, I need to become a fool to the world.
(3) To do that, I need to reject the world’s wisdom, and then embrace God’s wisdom.
(4) Then I will be a fool of God, and wise to the world.
(5) “For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength.”
(6) Then I will no longer be a fool (one who trusts in self) in my own eyes, and rather will be wise (one who trusts in God).
Remember, these are just my disjointed ramblings, but are well summed up in Paul’s words written to the Corinthians: “Do not deceive yourselves. If any one of you thinks he is wise by the standards of this age, he should become a “fool” so that he may become wise.” (I Cor. 3:18, NIV)